For the second time I love traffic. Wait, have I told you when is the first time ?. The first time I love traffic is whenever my events held, and there's a lot of cars are queuing on our event's gate.
At this time I'd really love traffic is because it could kills my sadness. I'm madly feel like I'm drowning in a deep deep deep sadness. My aunt got lungs cancer and how it made her suffering was really kills me. She couldn't even eat. She's more like a child. The way she speak, the way she call my name. The way she drink. It was freaking me out. Freaking my family out.
Sadly, nobody's really there when I need someone to hold.
What should I do then ?, crying on the front porch ?, crying when I drive home ?, crying when I eat ?. I did. I got my eyes was big and when people stared at me, maybe they think I just broke up with my boyfriend. Or I just lose my phone. Or I just lose both at the same time. But no, I just sad because of my aunt's illness.
So here I am. In the middle of Cibubur's traffic. Have no idea what to do. Don't know how to go. 23 yo manless, aimless girl (like Ika Natassa's said). Trying to entertain herself.
Macet kali ini setidaknya membuat saya merasa tidak sendirian, tidak peduli cowok dan cewek di depan saya naik motornya sempit-sempitan banget padahal jok belakangnya masih luas. The point is, I'm not alone. Even I am.